


Nothing.

by nobodynose



Category: Dream SMP - Fandom, Minecraft (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Lots of thinking., POV First Person, Reflection, Self-Doubt, Tubbo Centric (Tubbo POV), i STILL dont know how to tag. is this angst?? borderline hurt/comfort??? screw it im tagging both
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-17 14:28:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28601460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nobodynose/pseuds/nobodynose
Summary: He did nothing, and now there's nothing left. It's all gone.
Relationships: Toby Smith | Tubbo & Alexis | Quackity & TommyInnit
Comments: 7
Kudos: 24





	Nothing.

**Author's Note:**

> I did a lot of things that Grammarly would not agree with in this, but thats okay, I feel like it fit the tone 😌
> 
> Enjoy!

It's gone. It's all gone. It's all fucking gone.

All I could do was stare. Stare as half a dozen withers loomed above, leaving a trail of creeper holes behind them. Stare as TNT rained from above where I stood, shoving craters into the ground and throwing people into the air. Stare as my friends fought around me. Stare as my nation got destroyed. Stare.

I was hearing loud noises but it was silent - the sounds of screams and explosions working their way to the back of my mind.

It's all gone.

What could I do?! What can I do when everyone around me is fighting, and  _ dying. _ What can I do if I see they're not winning? What can I do if I  _ know we won't win? _ What can I do if it's already all gone?

" _ Tubbo _ ?!" 

Subconsciously, I turned my head towards Tommy. Slowly. Was he talking to _ me?  _ Or another Tubbo.

"What are you  _ doing _ ?"

I look around. 

What  _ am _ I doing? What am  _ I _ doing?  _ What  _ am I doing? There's nothing I  _ can  _ do.

* * *

There was  _ nothing.  _

There was  _ nothing  _ I could've done.

Why. Why couldn't I have done nothing. Why couldn't I have done  _ something?  _

I can't sleep. 

I'm in a sleeping bag on the dirt floor of Tommy's house. I can't sleep in mine cuz - well - it's gone. It's gone. Yeah, it's gone.

So sleepover with da bois. I guess. 

I roll over on my side, trying hard to close my eyes again. I can't. It's like they're glued open, but all I can see is the canyon that was once L'manburg. 

Where did it all go? Where did I go  _ wrong?  _

I looked across the room, seeing Tommy and Quackity sound asleep. They fought well today. They deserve the rest. Me? On the other hand? I did  _ nothing.  _

I try my best to unzip my sleeping bag without making a sound. Tip-toeing out of the house, I take one look behind me to make sure they don't see me. They don't. 

I leave.

I come to the intersection and stop. I was planning to go to the bench. The bench calms me down. But…

I turn left. 

I hear nothing but my footsteps on the wooden path. There's nothing else to hear. It's all gone now.

All of it. It's all gone.

I walk under the dirt tunnel that leads to L'manburg. Or… what _ was  _ L'manburg _. _

I take my time, barely putting my left foot in front of my right one as I walk. There was no rush. 

I come to the wooden staircase. It leads to nothing. 

Nothing at all.

Stone and ores and dirt and rubble. Nothing worth saving. Nothing worth having. 

I sit down on the top step. 

I watch the skeletons, finding a new home in the crater. And the zombies, wandering about hoping to find some food in the wreckage. 

For the first time all night, I could close my eyes.

I saw blackness.

For a second.

Then the Camarvan. Wilbur. Tommy. Just us three. (Eret? Fuck him). Laughing. We were laughing. Just playing the game. Oh, and Hamilton :) 

Then blackness again. But I could still hear us laughing. 

What happened. What did we do for things to turn out the way they did? What did I do wrong? What would I change if I could just go back?

I would… I would not do nothing. 

I breathed out and tried to stop thinking about the nation that I had watched crumble before me on that very same day. Quackity had made it clear that there was no going back, and that it was nobody's fault.

This couldn't have been prevented, Tubbo. It's not your fault.

Then why does it  _ feel  _ like it is? And how can I make it stop?

I shouldn't be dwelling. The past is the past and won't ever be the present again. It's gone and it's gone for good - I don't know why I care so much. 

But it's just… it's right in front of me. Torn to pieces. Before my very eyes. 

We're leaving tomorrow at sunrise. The second we can see, we're out of here. I don't know where we're going. Tommy said he does. Does he? Probably not. But it's assuring to know that at least none of us will be going in alone.

I think we'll be fine. We've been fine before. We're not fine now, but we'll get there.

God. What a terrible president I was, to just  _ stand _ and watch as my nation fell before me. I'm not gonna be able to forget about it, am I?

I sighed a long, drawn out sigh, mumbling under my breath, "I miss it already."

...

"Same."

I jumped and made a quiet screaming noise, turning my head towards the sound of the newly noticed voice. A couple feet behind me was Tommy, lying on his back, feet dangling off the side of the path, and eyes (still half closed) staring up at the cloudy night sky.

I stared at him for a moment. He turned his head toward me and smiled ever so slightly.

"How did you-"

"What do you mean  _ how did I _ ? It wasn't really hard to find you when you were only three meters from my house!"

I shook my head and turned back to the not-nation in front of me.

I could hear the frown in his voice, "You know it's not your fault Tubbo."

Sighing; "I know it's not my fault Tommy."

Then; "Guys what the  _ fuck,  _ that house is  _ scary  _ when you're in there alone!" Quackity, who was most definitely more awake than the two of us, called to us as he walked down the path in our direction, "You guys could've  _ told me  _ you were gonna stargaze or whatever!" He then looked up at the sky, "THERE'S NOT EVEN ANY FUCKING STARS OUT."

Tommy and I looked at each other and laughed, as Quackity sat down crisscross-applesauce on the other side of the path. "Seriously guys."

Leave it up to Quackity to lighten the mood, huh?

The three of us looked. 

Not at the same thing, mind you, but we were all seeing.

Tommy saw the sky. Quackity saw the tunnel. I saw L'manburg. Even when I closed my eyes.

And somehow, just the mere presence of my two friends made me feel better. I still did  _ nothing _ , and I still wish I did  _ something,  _ and I still know I shouldn't be dwelling on the past. But the fact that Tommy and Quackity were there almost made it easier for me to let go. 

I'm not letting go. I'm  _ not.  _ It just feels easier to. It's a bit of a relief - the feeling that, if I just wanted to, I could move on from the past. 

Sunlight. It wasn't too hard to see through the lack of trees. The sun was rising.

We were leaving at sunrise.

**Author's Note:**

> bad ending, i know 🙄👍
> 
> Feedback, as always, is appreciated!!


End file.
